The Ant and the Grasshopper
04-05-2006 | 06:48 PM
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From: Kincardine Ontario Canada
The Ant and the Grasshopper
CLASSIC VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a
fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant
is warm and well fed. The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter, so
he dies out in the cold.
THE END
THE CANADIAN VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a
fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant
is warm and well fed.
The shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why
the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others less
fortunate, like him, are cold and starving.
The CBC shows up to provide live coverage of the shivering grasshopper,
with cuts to a video of the ant in his comfortable warm home with a table
laden with food.
Canadians are stunned that in a country of such wealth, this poor
grasshopper is allowed to suffer so while others have plenty.The NDP, the
CAW and the Coalition Against Poverty demonstrate in front of
the ant's house.
Svend Robinson rants in an interview with Pamela Wallin that the ant has
gotten rich off the backs of grasshoppers, and calls for an immediate tax
hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share". In response to polls, the
Liberal Government drafts the Economic Equity and Grasshopper
Anti-Discrimination Act, retroactive to the beginning of the summer.
The ant's taxes are reassessed, and he is also fined for failing to hire
grasshoppers as helpers. Without enough money to pay both the fine and his
newly imposed retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the
government.
The ant moves to the US, and starts a successful agribiz company. The CBC
later shows the now fat grasshopper finishing up the last of the ant's
food, though Spring is still months away, while the government house he is
in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him
because he hasn't bothered to maintain it.
Inadequate government funding is blamed, Roy Romanow is appointed to head a
commission of enquiry that will cost $10,000,000. The grasshopper is soon
dead of a drug overdose.
The Toronto Star blames it on the obvious failure of government to address
the root causes of despair arising from social inequity. The abandoned
house is taken over by a gang of immigrant spiders, praised by the
government for enriching Canada's multicultural diversity, who promptly set
up a marijuana grow op and terrorize the community.
THE END
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a
fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant
is warm and well fed. The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter, so
he dies out in the cold.
THE END
THE CANADIAN VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a
fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant
is warm and well fed.
The shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why
the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others less
fortunate, like him, are cold and starving.
The CBC shows up to provide live coverage of the shivering grasshopper,
with cuts to a video of the ant in his comfortable warm home with a table
laden with food.
Canadians are stunned that in a country of such wealth, this poor
grasshopper is allowed to suffer so while others have plenty.The NDP, the
CAW and the Coalition Against Poverty demonstrate in front of
the ant's house.
Svend Robinson rants in an interview with Pamela Wallin that the ant has
gotten rich off the backs of grasshoppers, and calls for an immediate tax
hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share". In response to polls, the
Liberal Government drafts the Economic Equity and Grasshopper
Anti-Discrimination Act, retroactive to the beginning of the summer.
The ant's taxes are reassessed, and he is also fined for failing to hire
grasshoppers as helpers. Without enough money to pay both the fine and his
newly imposed retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the
government.
The ant moves to the US, and starts a successful agribiz company. The CBC
later shows the now fat grasshopper finishing up the last of the ant's
food, though Spring is still months away, while the government house he is
in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him
because he hasn't bothered to maintain it.
Inadequate government funding is blamed, Roy Romanow is appointed to head a
commission of enquiry that will cost $10,000,000. The grasshopper is soon
dead of a drug overdose.
The Toronto Star blames it on the obvious failure of government to address
the root causes of despair arising from social inequity. The abandoned
house is taken over by a gang of immigrant spiders, praised by the
government for enriching Canada's multicultural diversity, who promptly set
up a marijuana grow op and terrorize the community.
THE END
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